The slurping sound
was loud in the small dark room. Punctuated by the even louder moan and
'Yeah bitch!'. Then by the faintest whimper. White-blonde hair bobbed
furiously up and down. A hand, rough, calloused, with fingers like sausages
slowly began to dance it's way up one skinny thigh that rested on his
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. He swore he wouldn't touch you, he was gonna just look, just look "
trailed off useless. She looked down at her four year old son Calyx curled
in a ball in her arms still crying. What had she been thinking? Calyx's
scream had barely penetrated the Bliss fog, but enough of her maternal
instinct had responded and she grabbed Calyx away before more could happen.
"Sure, sure just look."
And with the Bliss humming through her veins, to her he had sounded so sincere.
He had come before. Then he spotted Calyx in the hall and started with his requests.
"Can he stay in the room?"
"Can he look at me?"
"Can he take his shirt off?"
be naked?" Each time upping the credits, upping the Bliss.
No, no, no her mind raced. The giggle turned to a whimper as her anxiety grew. "No " she whispered. "You're too young."
Lifting his face, she looked into those beautiful green eyes crying again now as her fear increased.
"Oh God no."
She pulled him to her breast and rocked him. Crying along with him for what he already had begun to endure and knew would only get harder as he grew. Oh god if he was already feeling at only four, what would it be like for him ten years from now?
"I'm so sorry baby, I'm so sorry."
She reached into the nightstand and pulled out two Bliss tabs. Broke one in pieces and pushed a bit of it into Calyx's mouth.
"It's alright baby, Mommy will make it all better."
As she watched those
green eyes begin to lose focus, she quickly downed the other tab, wondering
how long she would be able to take this.